The 'Amy & T.J.' hosts discussed a recent fight and worked through it with a professional.
T.J. Holmes and Amy Robach are working on some things!
On Tuesday's episode of their Amy & T.J. podcast, the couple got personal as they shared that they recently had an issue in their relationship that resulted in them spending a day away from each other.
"We can tell y'all that there has been one night that Robach and I have spent apart that can specifically be blamed and attributed to a fight that we had," Holmes shared.
"Yes, we needed space from each other and I think it did us good," Robach added.
Holmes said that the issue was something "small" that that he says started creeping up and "we let it fester."
Robach had no problem sharing what the exact issue was: Holmes' sleeping habits.
"For me and what sent me over the edge, and we've had this conversation so many times, about your sleeping habits," she shared. "You like to stay on the couch, you like to not go to bed, you started to make a meal at midnight and I just was frustrated. I was like, 'Can we just please go to bed?'"
Robach explained that they had a lot of obligations and they were emotionally exhausted, combined with pride, ego and alcohol.
"We literally spent a night apart because of that," Holmes added.
The fight came in the middle of the holiday season, when they were planning on spending time with their families on top of working together.
Holmes admitted that the timing of the disagreement wasn't ideal and left him feeling a little embarrassed.
"My first thought, 'We gotta make sure we're alright because family is coming to town and we have to put on a good face. We have to come into the studio together and we have to make sure we're upbeat and make sure that we don't lead on that anything is wrong,'" Holmes admitted.
The pair -- whose romance became public in 2022 -- shared that they didn't believe they needed relationship counseling at first. However, after their recent "tiff," they believed that it was time to bring in some help.
Enters Dr. Jeff Gardere, also known as "America’s Psychologist," who helped them navigate the growing pains in their relationship and the distance Holmes put between them after an argument.
Robach revealed that, after a dispute, Holmes goes into "shut down mode," where he freezes her out. Though he doesn't shout, the former GMA3 anchor reveals that it always hurts her feelings.
When it's time to reconnect, the pair admitted that they used words of affirmation via text.
"We both told each other that we missed each other and loved each other," Robach shared.
Holmes added, "Amy's favorite four words are 'I love you but...' and it's what comes after the 'but' that gets us in trouble."
Robach got candid as she shared that she would rather have Holmes yell at her in the moments they aren't seeing eye-to-eye, rather than freezing her out for a day or two. When Dr. Jeff noted that Holmes' time away is a bit of an selfish act, and a bit "passive aggressive," Holmes admitted that he feels bad about it, and he is working on it.
"I will tell you I have a very bad habit," Holmes admitted. "I don't let a lot of people in. You burn me one time, and I'm done with you and I will shut people out. But I'm not very forgiving. When I have somebody close to me, that is the person who brought the pain that I'm feeling. This person is not going to leave my life I get that. But I'm still dealing with that thing and grappling with being hurt so bad, and then trying to go back and receive love for the person that pains me."
He added, "It's different, I am a very warm and loving person and when that goes away, I'm sure that doesn't feel good."
"It's awful, it's so awful," Robach added.
"I'm sorry, baby," Holmes told her.
Dr. Jeff commended Holmes for apologizing and recognizing that he has something to work on and is willing to change. The professional said that their complex relationship has a strong love despite both of them still hurting and smiling through it all, and their shared experience with pain can create problems.
"I think so many people can relate to those types of issues. When you have painful periods in your life, you tend to take it out, or feel that emotional stress, you tend to put it on the person you love the most," Robach said.
After their conversation Holmes and Robach said they both felt like the surprise session helped their romance.
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