'The Bachelorette': Rachel Talks 'Really Hard' Hayden Situation, His Instagram Apology (Exclusive)

The controversial contestant called both Bachelorette's 'b**ches' on Monday's episode.

Rachel Recchia has some things she wants to say to Hayden Markowitz. ET spoke with Rachel and her Bachelorette co-lead, Gabby Windey, on Tuesday, and Rachel reacted to the drama that unfolded with the leisure executive on Monday night's episode.

The situation with Hayden started in week 3, when he told Gabby that, because she was "rough around the edges," he planned to pursue Rachel going forward. Despite knowing about that comment, Rachel offered Hayden a rose, which he accepted.

"I think ultimately watching everything back, it was so hard hearing him say the things he said to Gabby," Rachel told ET, before explaining her choice to give Hayden a rose. 

"Ultimately, those decisions we made at the time were decisions that we'd made together," Rachel said of herself and Gabby.

At the start of the most recent episode, Hayden had some choice words about both women. According to Meatball, Hayden made "a vulgar comparison" about Rachel and his ex’s breasts, said that Rachel and Gabby were "overreacting" to his "rough around the edges" comment, and had remarked, "I don’t trust these b**ches."

When Rachel was made aware of Hayden's continuing commentary, all of which he denied, she asked him to leave.

"After hearing what he had to say, it was the right decision to let him go," she said. "And it was just really hard to hear all the things that he had to say about both of us, really caught on camera."

After the episode aired, Hayden took to Instagram to issue an apology, writing in part that the show marked his "absolute worst and lowest moment."

"I have always tried to carry myself with humility and respect for others. However, my complete lapse of judgement was not only disappointing but it was absolutely unacceptable. I genuinely want to express my deepest apologies to both Gabby and Rachel for my actions," he wrote. "I take full responsibility for not being the man I was raised to be in those moments, especially towards these two wonderful deserving ladies who I truly do respect."

While Rachel, who said that she has not spoken to Hayden since his exit, confirmed that she'd been "hearing about it a lot," she didn't have any reaction to Hayden's apology, other than telling ET, "I think we just ultimately look forward to having a conversation with him at 'Men Tell All.'"

The Hayden situation was just one of many low points for Rachel, who has told the cameras multiple times that she's ready to quit the show. Still, though, she managed to stick it out until the end.

"I think people really just do see the highlight reel of our emotions," she said. "... Ultimately, I'm having these low moments, but I'm also having amazing ones and great dates. So always in the back of my mind, even if I'm having a hard moment and I'm doubting myself, I always remember the relationships that I have waiting and that's ultimately always still worth it to stay."

As for if the ups and downs were all worth it in the end, Rachel told ET of the experience, "I wouldn't trade this for the world."

The Bachelorette airs Mondays on ABC. Keep up with the historic season by following along with ET's coverage of the series.

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