"It just hit me a lot harder than I thought it would."
Meghan McCain is continuing to open up about her miscarriage. After penning a very personal essay for The New York Times this past summer about miscarrying, the 35-year-old View co-host opened up on Wednesday in a Good Morning America digital interview about the experience.
"It felt like this strange circle of life experience that just included a lot of death and a lot of tragedy," Meghan explained of first losing her father, John McCain, in August 2018 and then suffering a miscarriage.
She also revealed that she was far enough along in the pregnancy to know the gender of her child.
"The way I grieved my miscarriage and grieved my daughter was what could have been," she noted, revealing she was having a little girl. "It just hit me a lot harder than I thought it would."
Meghan opened up about struggling in the aftermath of the loss, saying that the pain "doesn't really get easier."
"It's hard, it's just really, really, really hard and I empathize with all women who have gone through it," she said. "And who may go through it. It's just horrific."
She chose to go public with her story to help others "feel less alone."
"I felt very, very alone during the entire experience," she explained. "And afterward, I just felt like I have this huge platform, why not use it to help other women feel less alone?"
Meghan also revealed that her previous views on children and motherhood left her confused after her miscarriage.
"I've always sort of been agnostic about having kids. I'm not one of these people, like, I don't feel naturally maternal," she explained. "I don't feel this natural draw to motherhood, and I think my response and how sad I felt afterward surprised me."
Back in her July essay, Meghan wrote, "I loved my baby, and I always will," adding, "I am not hiding anymore. My miscarriage was a horrendous experience and I would not wish it upon anyone."
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