Justin and Hailey Bieber are opening up about their whirlwind romance and marriage like never before.
Justin and Hailey Bieber are opening up about their whirlwind romance and marriage like never before.
The newlyweds sat down with Vogue for their first joint interview since tying the knot last September, and get extremely candid about everything from Justin's highly publicized past struggles to their issues in therapy. Read on for the biggest bombshells:
Justin is still dealing with issues stemming from his childhood:
At the start of the interview, the 24-year-old pop star reveals he recently cut his planned stay at the Hoffman Process -- a week-long therapy retreat that seeks to identify negative behaviors, moods and ways of thinking that developed in childhood -- and explains why.
“There were these séances. Or not really séances but these traditions," he says of some of the exercises he was uncomfortable with. "They light candles, and it kind of freaked me out. You sit on a mat, you put a pillow down, and you beat your past out of it. I beat the fact that my mom was depressed a lot of my life and my dad has anger issues. Stuff that they passed on that I’m kind of mad they gave me.”
Later, he talks about wanting a sense of security in his relationship with 22-year-old Hailey that he didn't get from his father, Jeremy Bieber, growing up.
"I’ve always wanted security -- with my dad being gone sometimes when I was a kid, with being on the road," he says.
He also admits that becoming a superstar in his early teens had a negative impact on his development.
“I’ve been successful since I was 13, so I didn’t really have a chance to find who I was apart from what I did," he explains. "I just needed some time to evaluate myself: who I am, what I want out of my life, my relationships, who I want to be -- stuff that when you’re so immersed in the music business you kind of lose sight of.”
“I was real at first, and then I was manufactured as, slowly, they just took more and more control," he says of the music business. "I started really feeling myself too much. People love me, I’m the sh*t -- that’s honestly what I thought. I got very arrogant and cocky. I was wearing sunglasses inside.”
In 2017, Justin cut his Purpose tour short.
“I got really depressed on tour,” he recalls. “I haven’t talked about this, and I’m still processing so much stuff that I haven’t talked about. I was lonely. I needed some time.”
Hailey and Justin broke up the first time because of a dramatic incident:
Hailey and Justin first met in 2009 when her father, Stephen Baldwin, introduced the two, but they didn't start dating until 2015. Hailey notes that contrary to some reports, she wasn't a superfan of Justin's prior to their relationship, and says that they were strictly friends at first because of a "weird age gap."
But when the two did start dating and made it official with a kissing pic in 2016, things didn't end well.
“Negative things happened that we still need to talk about and work through,” Hailey shares, hinting at a betrayal. “Fizzled would not be the right word -- it was more like a very dramatic excommunication. There was a period where if I walked into a room, he would walk out.”
They eventually reconnected last June when they ran into one another at a religious conference in Miami, the beginning of their whirlwind romance and subsequent marriage.
"The common denominator, I promise you, is always church," she says. "By then we were past the drama. I just gave him a hug. By the end of the conference, he was like, ‘We’re not going to be friends.’ I was like, ‘We’re not?’"
Within a month, they were engaged. Still, Hailey insists it wasn't a rash decision.
“I prayed to feel peace about the decision, and that’s where I landed,” she shares. “I love him very much. I have loved him for a long time.”
Justin abused drugs to the point where security sometimes had to check his pulse:
Justin is open about his past drug use and some of the factors that led to it.
“I found myself doing things that I was so ashamed of, being super-promiscuous and stuff, and I think I used Xanax because I was so ashamed," he says. "My mom always said to treat women with respect. For me that was always in my head while I was doing it, so I could never enjoy it. Drugs put a screen between me and what I was doing. It got pretty dark. I think there were times when my security was coming in late at night to check my pulse and see if I was still breathing.”
As for Hailey, the magazine says due to her father's past cocaine addiction, she has "never touched a drug." She says she's proud of how far Justin has come after he temporarily moved into his pastor's home in 2014 for an informal detox.
"I grieved very intensely over the whole situation,” she says. “I just wanted him to be happy and be good and be safe and feel joy. But I’m really proud of him. To do it without a program, and to stick with it without a sober coach or AA or classes -- I think it’s extraordinary. He is, in ways, a walking miracle.”
Hailey says marriage is "really effing hard" and the two go to marriage counseling:
Though Justin definitely doesn't have a problem being romantic with his wife -- at one point during the interview he kisses her neck and whispers "Guess what? You’re amazing,” and repeatedly calls her his "baby boo" -- Hailey is candid about their relationship not being a fairy tale. The two are open about seeing a marriage counselor.
“The thing is, marriage is very hard,” Hailey says. “That is the sentence you should lead with. It’s really effing hard.”
“It’s been so hard for me to trust people,” Justin adds of his own issues. “I’ve struggled with the feeling that people are using me or aren’t really there for me ... One of the big things for me is trusting myself. I’ve made some bad decisions personally, and in relationships. Those mistakes have affected my confidence in my judgment. It’s been difficult for me even to trust Hailey. We’ve been working through stuff. And it’s great, right?”
Hailey stresses that while their marriage definitely takes work, they're both 100 percent committed.
“It’s just that I’m fighting to do this the right way, to build a healthy relationship,” she says. “I want people to know that. We’re coming from a really genuine place. But we’re two young people who are learning as we go. I’m not going to sit here and lie and say it’s all a magical fantasy. It’s always going to be hard. It’s a choice. You don’t feel it every single day. You don’t wake up every day saying, ‘I’m absolutely so in love and you are perfect.’ That’s not what being married is. But there’s something beautiful about it anyway -- about wanting to fight for something, commit to building with someone."
"We’re really young, and that’s a scary aspect," she adds. "We’re going to change a lot. But we’re committed to growing together and supporting each other in those changes. That’s how I look at it. At the end of the day, too, he’s my best friend. I never get sick of him.”
Justin was celibate when he rekindled his romance with Hailey:
Vogue notes that Justin had actually been celibate by choice for more than a year when he reconnected with Hailey last June. The pop star says that he had "a legitimate problem with sex," and was once "super-promiscuous."
“[God] doesn’t ask us not to have sex for him because he wants rules and stuff,” Justin explains of his decision to be celibate for a time. “He’s like, I’m trying to protect you from hurt and pain. I think sex can cause a lot of pain. Sometimes people have sex because they don’t feel good enough. Because they lack self-worth. Women do that, and guys do that."
"I wanted to rededicate myself to God in that way because I really felt it was better for the condition of my soul," he continues. "And I believe that God blessed me with Hailey as a result. There are perks. You get rewarded for good behavior.”
Still, he notes that the desire to have sex with Hailey wasn't the primary factor for the two tying the knot so quickly.
“When I saw her last June, I just forgot how much I loved her and how much I missed her and how much of a positive impact she made on my life," he says. "I was like, Holy cow, this is what I’ve been looking for.”
Justin and Hailey are complete opposites emotionally:
Justin and Hailey acknowledge that he's the emotional one in the relationship, while she's much more level-headed. Last August, he was snapped crying in New York City, as Hailey comforted him.
“I’m the emotionally unstable one,” Justin says. “I struggle with finding peace. I just feel like I care so much and I want things to be so good and I want people to like me. Hailey’s very logical and structured, which I need. I’ve always wanted security ... I need one thing that’s certain. And that is my baby boo."
Meanwhile, Hailey notes: “He’ll say, ‘I feel,’ and I’ll say, ‘I think.' I have to really dive deep and struggle to be in touch with my emotions. He gets there immediately.”
One thing they fight about is communicating given their very different personalities.
“Fighting is good,” Justin says. “Doesn’t the Bible talk about righteous anger? We don’t want to lose each other. We don’t want to say the wrong thing, and so we’ve been struggling with not expressing our emotions, which has been driving me absolutely crazy because I just need to express myself, and it’s been really difficult to get her to say what she feels."
Justin says another issue is actually getting Hailey to lighten up.
“She’s trying to be this grown-up,” he says. “I think we can be married and still have fun and enjoy our adolescence. That’s something we’re talking about.”
Justin isn't comfortable being called religious:
Though Justin has been open about his strong faith and regularly attends church, he says he doesn't categorize himself as "religious."
“I wouldn’t consider myself religious,” Justin says. “That confuses a lot of people because they’re like, 'Well, you go to church.' I believe in the story of Jesus -- that’s the simplicity of what I believe. But I don’t believe in all the religious elitism and pretentiousness, like people are better than you because they come to church, like you have to go to church and dress a certain way."
"I get sensitive when religion comes up because it’s been so hurtful to a lot of people," he adds. "I don’t want to be thought of as someone who stands for any of the injustice that religion has done and does do.”
For more on the couple, watch the video below:
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