Jonathan Van Ness Recalls the Moment He First Found Out He Had HIV

Jonathan Van Ness
Today Show/NBC

"It was something I had been very fearful of, as a small child."

Jonathan Van Ness admits he's feeling "kind of Twilight Zone-ish" after revealing he's HIV-positive.

The Queer Eye star gave his first TV interview since coming forward about his decision to share his diagnosis in his new memoir, Over the Top.

"I do have this very calm sense of, 'I did this for a reason,' and I stand by those reasons and I think it is really important for me to speak about the things I have talked about in this book," Van Ness shared with Today's Hoda Kotb on Tuesday. "I think it was the right thing to do."

The 32-year-old entertainer recalled how he found out that he was HIV-positive seven years ago when he was still a hairstylist in St. Louis, Missouri. 

"I had, like, not been feeling amazing…and the next thing I knew I was on my back on the ground…so I went home and went to bed, and the next day I went to Planned Parenthood and that was where I found out that I had HIV," he told Kotb. "I just remember it was the moment that you, like, dread hearing. It's the thing that I had, like, feared…It was something I had been very fearful of, as a small child."

Van Ness also wants to help rid the stigmas surrounding those with HIV. "You take a pill every day and it basically kills all the copies of the blood and that means that you can achieve and maintain an undetectable viral load," he explained.

Gushing over his life now, Van Ness continued, "I have picked up figure skating, I have done nothing but get cuter and be able to work harder and longer hours. I feel like I’m thriving."

On Sunday, ET's Kevin Frazier caught up with the Queer Eye guys at the 71st Emmy Awards, but Van Ness was noticeably absent. "He is at home, he's taking four days off," Tan France shared. Bobby Berk added, "He's moving this weekend into a new place so he's like, 'I just need to be zen this weekend.'"

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